El Tesoro

Justin: Yeah, it couldn't wait, here's my review of El Tesoro. OK, so I grew up in Santa Cruz. We have some serious goddamn burrito places in Santa Cruz that, to my taste, are a far cry above most anything in San Francisco. I'll give it to a few taquerias in the Mission for technically being more authentic, but when it comes to proper gigantic Mexican food, my heart will always pine for a Chimichanga Plate at Los Pinos. El Tesoro (Spanish for The Treasure) is a little slice of Santa Cruz in San Francisco, to me. The salsa bar with those pickled jalapenos and carrots that I love, fresh lime slices, radishes, a bunch of different salsa varieties. The habanero one is dangerous. Every place in Santa Cruz had a salsa bar, but in SF they are a rarity. Why is this? Their 5 dollar regular nachos are THE best value for food on our block. Chips, beans, cheese and salsa and tons of them. This place knows how to do the fundamentals. Like beans. How can one properly judge Mexican food if they refuse to sample the frijoles? El Tesoro is also not just Mexican food. You can get burgers, fries, cheese steaks, Cesar salads, and they're open until midnight daily. They have horchata. They have futbol on the TV in the back. If I have a five dollar bill and want to eat a real meal, I head across the street to El Tesoro.

Chels: Let's get this out of the way right now. Yes, I HATE beans. They taste like dirt. There. But I have a serious beef with El Tesoro. I wanted to like them, I really did. In fact, they were THE very first dining establishment we tried in our hood when we moved in almost 2 years ago. But they suck. Their rice is gross (and has CORN in it, excuse me?) and I never can decide on a type of meat to get there that doesn't immediately make me regret any and all decisions made before it. They do offer multiple choices of types of tortillas for you to choose from, so there's that. But El Tesoro's defining moment came when I made the mistake of ordering a Chicken Caesar Salad. Believe me, this idea was botched from the get go, I know that. But regardless, I ordered my ill-fated salad and all was good. At least that was what I had though, until half of the SFPD decided to walk in right after me. Now, I'm fully aware that in the great scope of the universe I am nothing but a lump of mass on a speck of dirt, got it. But if I give you money for food I expect to get said food in a timely manner. But NOOOOO, not at El Tesoro. They went ahead and made all 10 of the cops burritos before even beginning my order (It's a salad folks, just chop some lechuga and I'll be on my way). Then after the last cop walked out, a ,one worker ran across the street to the corner store and returned with two heads of lettuce. REALLY GUY DO YOU THINK I DIDN'T JUST SEE YOU RUN ACROSS THE STREET AND BUY THAT?